just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
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