I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
