so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
