Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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