found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize