dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Randomize