I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize