glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize
