I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
