trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Randomize