You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize
