Nicole vs. Life
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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