she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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