Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
My boob is missing a layer of skin
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
