You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
wow bdsm is so cute
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