Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize
