Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
operation have a gay friend backfired
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
