Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I think my moral compass just broke
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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