In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize