Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
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