Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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