how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
They have beer where we have blood.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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