I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
