Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize
