hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize