She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
