Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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