So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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