Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
