That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Randomize
