Don't you send me to vm
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
