Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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