Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
