I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
