you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
