i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
