took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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