NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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