You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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