very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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