Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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