he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
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