Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
