Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
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