Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
you had me at cake vodka
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
