happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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