Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Barsexuality is the new black.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize
