Dual....:-)
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
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I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
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