It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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