I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
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