His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
